As you have probably noticed if you follow me regularly here on the blog, or on instagram, I have been a little bit more MIA than usual.
I am struggling with balance in my life as I often do. I have this constant battle inside myself of wanting to just be at home with my children, making meals, tidying up, creating a loving and spirit-filled home for my family. The other half of me has responsibilities like keeping up with my photography business, updating my blog regularly, answering emails from people, worrying about money and how I can optimize my business, scheduling, planning, preparing for sessions. I feel like I have two more than full time jobs and sometimes it pulls at my heart heavier than other times.
Lately I have been praying a lot. The Lord is so good to me, He really is. Always so gracious and loving and forgiving of me. He has blessed me in my life both with family and opportunity for business, but sometimes I wonder how He wants me to do both. I’m in a crossroads of sorts, I feel, but I know we’ll get through it. Today I’m just feeling a little down. You know those days where you feel like you could cry at any minute and not really for any specific reason? That’s how I feel today. I asked my girls this morning over breakfast if they had ever felt like that. Stella quickly replied “nope.” and went on eating her porridge. Harlo assured me that she knew how that felt, though.
Today I have an overwhelming to-do list, but I’m taking my time with it. I woke up to cuddles from my ladies. We slowly made our way to the kitchen where Stella requested we have porridge. It’s her favorite, as well as Harlo’s and my favorite so I thought that was a great idea. She helped me every step of the way. Until our porridge boiled over the top of the pot, then she told me she was going to wait over here, across the kitchen, because it was making her “a little nervous.” I thought that was a good idea.
Instead of rushing to my computer, I sat and ate a leisurely breakfast with my girls. We talked about our day and how preschool is starting soon. We talked about sometimes feeling sad, but always being grateful and serving others when we feel down. Harlo talked mostly in an english accent, which is my latest favorite thing.
Now I’m sitting at my computer, tying up my loose-ends. I’ve already got a pretty good start to the work load while my girls were playing on ABCmouse.com, now they’ve scurried off to play with their little imaginations. It’s my favorite thing to over-hear.
Stella has been wearing a bikini she found at Grandma’s house for the last, oh, probably 5 days. I think this is just the beginning, too. These pictures alone may have cured my bad day.
I also stumbled across this conference talk from last spring.. it may have been just what I needed to hear today.
I hope you’re having a great Wednesday! We’re in this together, right?