I am entering a season of serious intentional living.
I have found that intentional living sometimes comes in waves. I get in the ebb of life’s grooves, and have to redirect myself to the flow.
I am coming out of a growing season, where I was looking outward at what was ahead in our lives as we made choices and navigated some difficult situations. The answer to my prayers in this season though, was to instead look inward to determine our future. It was not the opportunities that may or may not lay ahead for our family that was the answer to this certain question, but rather the contentment that was already enveloping us in this current season.
For the first time in our lives, we aren’t chasing the next dream. We are living the dream we chased and caught. I don’t mean that we aren’t dreaming anymore, or that we “have arrived”, but specifically, we worked long and hard for years upon years to purchase the house we currently live in. We are now presented with a good amount of equity that would secure us a larger home, a home we could comfortably “grow into”, a home that could possibly be our “forever home”. Yet, this particular opportunity of moving from our beloved little cottage came rather quickly for my liking. We are always willing to do what is best for our family, but as we looked seriously into that, we realized that a bigger “more comfortable” home was just simply not what was best. Or perhaps a more clear way to phrase it, is that a bigger home would not be “better”.
This answer became clear to us each day as we contemplated selling our beloved cottage – our three bedroom house surrounding now six people. It became clear in the way we felt as we pulled into our driveway, admiring the jasmine we planted crawling up our columns. The happy welcome our blue front door presents – the door I painted with a 6 week old baby Grae strapped to my body. It became clear in the way we feel when our family crowds around the island for breakfast as we read scripture, discuss important family matters, or giggle as I dance around Mr. Miller, making him blush. It became clear in the way we feel with all three of our girls snuggled into bed for the night – in their shared bedroom, as our precious son sleeps soundly in the room right next door. It became clear in the way we perfectly fill up our living room – a spot that seems just exactly the right size for our family of six. It became clear in the perfectness of me making dinner, babies coloring and snacking on the counter right beside me, and the sound of the big girls practicing piano filling our entire home.
We live in a little cottage – a little cottage we have worked hard on making our very own. A little cottage that has our stamp in every single corner. This little cottage may someday feel too small for us, but happily, today is not that day. And we don’t have to move into a bigger home because we can, or because that’s “what you do”, or because it’s expected to keep growing materialistically.
I think there is something to be said for chasing after a dream to accomplishment, but there is also something to be said when recognizing that enough really is enough for now.
It became apparent that happiness may await us in the next chapter of our lives, but one thing we know for sure, is that happiness is right here where we are already. And for now, that is exactly enough.